Moving Forward

Things are moving forward here.  I'm just trying to stay focused and regulated and Krishna keep things moving.  Confirmed now is a noon program every Sunday of August at Shine Studio!  Krishna Kirtan Ki Jai!!!!
  Radhanath Swami says: "In Krishna Consciousness you can't attain (advancement).  It's a matter of mercy.  It's a matter of attracting the All-Attractive through your sincerity.  Therefore you must be enthusiastic no matter what happens."

An effulgent Radhanath Swami giving Harinama initiation and japa beads to an incredibly fortunate soul.  I'm blissed out over the whole scene, looking from above.  The devotee receiving initiation is in the other picture with us also.   The saintly Yugala Kishora Prabhu looks on attentively from below.  Detroit ISKCON Temple, July 2011

 

Our Real Desires

"Lord Krsna now directly says that Arjuna should fight for sake of fighting because He desires the battle.  There is no consideration of happiness or distress, profit or gain, victory or defeat in the activities of Krsna Consciousness.  That everything should be performed for the sake of Krsna is transcendental consciousness; so there is no reaction to material activities.  He who acts for his own sense gratification, either in goodness or in passion, is subject to the reaction, good or bad.  But he who has completely surrendered himself in the activities of Krsna Consciousness is no longer obliged to anyone, nor is he a debtor to anyone, as one is in the ordinary course of activities."  Srila Prabhupada in the Bhagavad Gita purport text 2:38.

The material world is a constant struggle.  We constantly struggle to maintain the body, feed it, clean it, and keep it healthy.  We struggle to pay our debts and bills with great effort and worry.  We constantly attempt to maintain happiness over distress, depression and fear.  We strive to maintain a good and attractive social image.  We suffer with the heat, the cold, the rain, the drought, the bugs.  We try to maintain balance and equanimity in a tumultuous sea of suffering, conflict, birth, disease, old age and death.  If all we are essentially doing is maintaining our equanimity and physical/mental/emotional reality, what is our goal?  Is it to squeeze in some sense gratification whenever possible, get a drink or toke after work and relax?  Get some sex, get some pleasure, go to a show....In this way most people live in darkness.  They think life is just a struggle to try to be happy and enjoy as much as possible, while, at best, doing the least amount of harm to others and maybe giving some charity.
People are really suffering deeply in this world.  We may not see it, we may ignore it or be so well off materially, young and having fun that we aren't around it, but I see it everyday.  So much stress, worry, anxiety, lust, anger, dissatisfaction, pain, fear....so much disease, obesity, intoxication, deformity and malnutrition.  America is becoming like a third world country some places.  Maybe this will impel us to wake up and start soul-searching for our real purpose outside of this pitiful existence.   We can use this pain as fuel for our Bhakti.
In this way most of us are unconscious of our real goal and our real self.  Even those that believe we have a soul are not enlightened to what it is, where it originated, and what is it's real purpose.  Thus usually they simply hope for a transfer from their Earthly reality of constant struggle for happiness over distress onto a "spiritual" reality after death; where the soul can enjoy celestial pleasure forever and not have any more distress.  But, at best this is extended metaphysical sense gratification, wherein one hopes to enjoy pleasure forever and be served or have nothing to actually do.
Here Radhanath Swami explains with spiritual wisdom:
"Srila Prabhupada defines Bhakti as "the activity of the heart in which it expresses it's love for God through service."  Love that is not expressed is not real...Real love is expressed through service.  Actually the most fundamental need of every living being is to love someone.  There can be no fulfillment of the heart without that...the basic need of every living entity is to love someone.  Therefore relationships are the most sacred gifts we have in life.  And the reality of love comes through service.  Those who are really, truly in the spirit of service and sacrifice, for the object of their love, actually find fulfillment in that.  Not in exploitation...Only giving of the heart for the welfare, for the pleasure, for the service of another can actually give satisfaction to the heart.
But, in this world everything is temporary, and everyone is limited.  Therefore the Bhagavad Gita and Srimad Bhagavatam, they explain so nicely that the Supreme Occupation for all humanity is unconditional, unmotivated loving service to the Supreme Lord."  From the lecture "Real Fortune is Bhakti" 2001.
Why is it that the Supreme occupation for every person is to love and serve God?  Because we are all parts and parcels of God's energy.  Everything originates in Krsna.  Being thus, we are all God's children.  Our natural propensity is to love and serve; someone, somehow.  This propensity to love and serve naturally manifests in the heart of a mother, or a child with a pet.  In this world this propensity to serve and love can often manifest in exploitive or harmful ways, such as when people become obsessive workaholics,  vengeful ex-lovers or prostitute hunters, or exploitive corporations (who should be simple servants).  Although in a corrupted state, actually all these people at heart simply desire and need is love, service to others, and to be loved.  In less extreme cases people simply become loyal employees, soldiers, parents, students, etc.  This propensity to love, serve, and sacrifice for loved ones is there in everyone.  But, like Radhanath Swami explains, this world and every person is temporary and limited.  If we are a spiritual spark, a soul, then that means our ultimate source lies somewhere, and that source is Krsna.  Because Krsna is the ultimate source, He is the ultimate beneficiary of all actions and energy.  All sacrifices and actions are meant for Him alone.  "Whatever a man may sacrifice to other gods, O son of Kunti, is really meant for Me alone, but it is offered without true understanding."  BG 9:24

What "gods" does the world serve?  Money, of course.  The body.  Celebrities, famous people, musicians, artists, politicians.  Their country.  Even their pets.  With so much love and devotion all these are served and dedicated to.  But what is the result?  How much of it lasts?  How much of it deeply satisfies and does not disappoint, ever?  How much service to the world and people is spiritually illuminating, purifying, and gives great peace?  If we have a spiritual reason for doing such things then we get some knowledge and happiness from endeavors.  And, if we do such things with an understanding of renunciation, an understanding that it is all to be done simply as a temporary duty in this world, but that our truest and highest duty is service and love to Krsna, than we become rightly situated, graceful, peaceful and satisfied.  Krsna then reciprocates and gives us His love.  We will feel that love, and become satisfied.  When we serve Krsna, all is taken care of and what our soul really longs for most, the only thing we actually need and desire, which we're ultimately all dying and suffering without, becomes attainable: real love with God.
Krsna wants our love.  He desires our relationship.  If we offer our life with love and devotion, he will accept it.  Krsna Consciousness, the path of Bhakti, is urging us to move forward, to look deeper, to be more sincere, to be more open, to be more honest.  To understand our pain and suffering and discover it's real source-personal desire.  Desires to enjoy this world, to accumulate material things, and to indulge in our lust, anger, fear and greed.  Desires to promote our selves, enjoy fame (however subtle), and to exploit others (however small).  This is the poison in our hearts that must be cleaned out to achieve peace and spiritual understanding.  We must daily cross over to the land of dedication: Krsna Bhakti.  This land of exploitation will swallow us and degrade us to death, all the while covering us in illusions of grandeur, pleasure and false happiness.
The love we seek is in God, Krsna.  The pleasure we seek is ultimately found in Him alone.  And the ultimate object of service is Krsna and the spiritual master.  This alone will fully satisfy the soul in this life, and for all time.  Hare Krishna  

Please listen to this:
http://audio.iskcondesiretree.info/01_-_His_Divine_Grace_A_C_Bhaktivedanta_Swami_Srila_Prabhupada/Bhajans/Vol-03/05_-_The_Vintage_Series/SP_Bhajans_02_-_Hare_Krsna_Kirtan.mp3          

Sadhu Sangha

Last night I was pleased to welcome the only Vaishnavas I know of in Louisville for an evening of kirtan, spiritual discussion and of course, prasadam.

Indumati Didi playing mrdanga nicely in the kirtan

They had never been to the center, and seemed pleased with the way the project was coming along.  We sung traditional Vaishnava bhajans to the mridanga and kartals for over an hour and then Jaya Sri didi read from Bhakti Rasayana by Sanatana Goswami and spoke on the verses.  After that we all shared prasadam, including an incredibly good wild blackberry nectar and fresh mangoes!  When I woke this morning, I felt a very good, pure vibe in the house and I attest that to the sadhu sangha and bhajans sung the night before.

It was an auspicious gathering indeed.  Sadhu Sanga, or the association of Vaishnavas for glorification of Krishna and honoring prasadam is completely necessary for Bhakti to develop.  It's a very special, auspicious phenomenon with great potency.  

JayaSri Didi enthusiastically giving a talk on Bhakti Rasyana 

The Louisville Sanga gathered together in the temple room

  

Krishna is SO kind, He allows anyone to serve

Hare Krishna,
Many new things are happening now in our little world of Louisville Sankirtan.  I just had two guests stay here who I met at the Bonnaroo music festival.  They were nice, sincere young men.  They have gone through some very serious trials and spiritual struggles as they left a very long, incredibly misleading and incredibly harmful involvement in a new age occult group.  It was challenging at times to hear their incredibly intense tales but I think Krishna brought them here for a reason-to fill them with His mercy and encourage them to chant His Holy Names.  I did the best I could to serve them, stuff them with Prasadam and give them the association of Srila Prabhupada and Radhanath Swami.  I hope the best for them and they will be in my prayers.

The Divine Lotus Feet of Radha-Krishna overpowers all evil and all fear.

Yesterday, I was feeling some troubles in my mind.  I was hearing other people's concerns and fears about this project and I started thinking "How am I supposed to do this?  How will it all work out?  How will we afford this?"  I was feeling some trouble like this, trying to materially calculate.  I then just decided to trust and forget my mental doubts.    

Right after that a huge success happened.  Our ads on a world-wide devotee forum went up after weeks of waiting, and responses immediately came in offering assistance.  One Indian gentlemen offered to send cases of books and laxsmhi for the Iskcon Prison Ministry service.  Chaitanya Mahaprabhu ki Jai!!!!!  I'll be so glad to get these books out, already over a dozen prisoners are sincerely asking for them.

Then, another man from Mumbai wrote me saying he's interested in possibly coming here and living and doing sankirtan full-time, and sounded sincere.  So that is very intriguing and I wrote him back.  I actually love to live with inspired Indian devotees.  If he seems seriously interested I'll have to share an intriguing little detail about his name on this blog later......

Also happening is the garden.  Things are growing!  Everything looks very happy and it's growing super fast.   By Krishna's mercy we may get something to cook and make a nice offering for Krishna.

A Baby Butternut Sqaush plant looking great.

Figs have such a magical, Holy presence.

The new compost pile

Yard-Long Bean plants 

I've been working out the details with Maria at Shine about the kirtan programs at her studio.  Looks like we'll be doing once a week starting August, most likely on Sundays.

Now that the house is getting in order, I feel a pull to be more active in the community.  When more donations and books come in I'm looking forward to doing some sankirtan and books.  I'd like to do a book table outside this Indian store where I know the young owners.  They're very wacky and favorable, yet very modern Hindu-ish.  I'll tell there colorful story some other time!

So, right now I feel so thankful to Krishna.  Although I'm so fallen and foolish, He's mercifully letting things move forward and allowing me to serve.  Right when I was feeling some struggle He stepped in and doused me with flowers and nectar.  May I distribute that nectar to others.  What little thing I can do, He is allowing and reciprocating.  

New Year Victory

Hare Krishna,
Today was a really intense day.  I had a wonderful morning of sadhana and chanting.  Today was ekadasi, so it was fast from grains and beans.
I went downtown to the "yoga studio" to meet the manager Maria.  It is a clean and attractive two-story structure in the heart of downtown.  I was greeted by a very nice, spiritually-oriented lady in her fifties who asked "Are you the Das?"  Very nice question, as "das" means servant, and that is the Yogi's ultimate goal.  So I said yes.  She was a member of the center and introduced me to Maria, a bright, enthusiastic and conscious and kind-hearted mother who was very eager to speak to me right away.  She led me into the yoga space and we sat on a big round rug and she asked me to tell her about myself.  So I spoke of my background and travels, my alternative living history, my time in Hawai'i and how I became a yogi.  I spoke a bit about my temple life and pursuit of Krishna Consciousness, but kept it brief and simple.  She infomed me that the center is definitely not a yoga center, but something of an eclectic healing center and dance/yoga/art center.  Even better.  She also informed me that it is the first day of the Mayan New Year, and commented that it was an auspicious meeting.  Indeed!

We shared and talked for almost an hour and it went extremely well.  She would like to have me start the programs in August and felt very positive about it.  She allowed me to share and be myself and she had very open and conscious energy, which was conducive for things going well.  It's a very interesting place and I can see I will likely become pretty heavily involved in what's happening there.

As soon as I got back to the center I sat down to feast on some fruit and a recording of Radhanath Swami's lecture was playing.  He said that for a devotee, they don't even consider how materially things will work out, or worry about it.  They simply put all faith that Krishna will provide and establish everything necessary.  It was perfect timing.  Radhanath Swami ki jai!
So it was a very good day over all.  That was a big move forward today.  Krishna is very kind and merciful.

Krishna's Grace

Wow, I'm so happy.  I just found a little gift from Krishna: 

HH Radahanath Swami reaching out to bless me (Detroit, Michigan June 2011).  Radhanath Swami
is merciful towards the most fallen and degraded. 

I feel so blessed to have this picture.  Not many of these were taken by the photographer, and so I'm so fortunate that this was taken and posted online.  I was so extremely eager in this picture to speak with Radhanath Swami, as always.  I only had a very brief moment but it was sweet and meaningful.  

I sometimes go through so many intense emotions in one day.  I've been feeling this strong wave of grace coming over me today.  I noticed also that I am feeling very situated in what I am doing right now. I don't feel any wonderlust or any doubts.  But I feel much separation from Vrindavan, even though I've never been.  I feel cursed and blessed at the same time to be here doing what I'm doing.  Cursed sometimes to be in such a degraded place (this whole material world, actually) but overwhelmingly blessed to be knowledgeable about the eternal supreme spiritual journey and the path of loving devotion to God, Bhakti.  

Do we have any idea at all how Srila Prabhupada struggled with life and death. poverty, threats, homelessness and disease just to bring these teachings to the USA?  Whatever any of us do is simply tailgating after Srila Prabhupada.  He set up everything for us through his life and his death.  He gave us everything we need to go back home, back to Godhead.  It's an absolute honor to serve in whatever microscopic way I can.  Please let me do more, Lord.

This world is all a big test.  How much we love and serve others is how much spiritual consciousness we have.  This world will overtake us like weeds overtake a garden if we are not very, very careful.  That's why I stress the importance of daily, serious spiritual practice, sadhana.  Sadhana is cleansing of the temple, and pulling the weeds around it.  Please clean this filthy, smelly, weedy heart of mine, Krishna.   

Everything is a Test

Hare Krishna,
So yesterday I worked for hours cleaning and getting everything very nice and ready for my guests, trimming bushes, mopping, sorting things out, etc.  Then, I started cooking a feast for everyone and made a savory mung dal, rice, cauliflower and squash subji, and even a ginger-peach nectar.  I was listening to a lecture by Radhanath Swami as I was cooking.  Right as I was about to finish the feast I get a call that no one is coming over and everyone had cancelled.  Although I was feeling hurt and very disappointed I tried to maintain focus on finishing the cooking in good consciousness and offered it with surrender to Krishna's will.  But, it was disappointing and quite sad for me that no one was coming over, especially after all the work involved and loving preparations I had made.

Right as I was going through these emotions and thoughts Radhanath Swami starts telling a story about a little child on the beach making castles out of sand and how he's so happy and proud of his little castle, until inevitably it is dissolved by the waves of the sea and disappears.  It really hit me how everything is simply a test and can lead us either to suffering and desire, or to freedom and wisdom.  I realized that everyday I should be working as focused and intensely as I was that day, and doing things with that much consciousness and effort.

Everyday we should be cleaning the temple of our heart, putting flowers their, decorating it, and making it the perfect place for God to come and reside their.  We should make our heart the perfect temple of God through all that we do, say, think, practice and act on.

As I was offering to Krishna the meal I had cooked, I was meditating how Krishna never cancels on us.  He will never disappoint us and never let us down.  Especially if we dedicate to making our heart His temple and serving Him with love and devotion.  He's always there in our hearts, waiting, waiting.  He's patient enough to wait forever.  As soon as we wish to make our heart open to Him, He reciprocates immediately, when we are really ready.  He will know.
So instead of playing in the sand making castles, I need to be making my heart God's temple.

Srila Prabhupada saving us from the ocean of birth and death

What the World Needs Most

The past few days have been very intense.  Yesterday I was very agitated by my anarthas and lusts and also disturbed by some poor soul online who posted very negative and nasty things about an article I wrote about Bhakti some time ago.  I responded perhaps a bit stronger than I should, but it was just so ignorant and offensive I had to say something.  It's so sad when people won't even try to understand what Bhakti is, even from a purely intellectual viewpoint, and instead spit venom and hatred on something they really know nothing about and have never tasted even a drop of.  It's a real shame, for them and their suffering condition.  I pray that they will investigate Bhakti openly and come to realize at least some of it's pure sweetness, power and glory.
Thankfully I was invited to go to a gathering of the only Vaishnava sangha (practicing group) I know of for hundreds of miles.  They are a group of spirited, very bright young ladies all around my age, who have been on the path of Bhakti for about two years.  I went to their house last night and we sung kirtan, heard a nice talk from one of them, and then feasted on prasadam, including some very delicious mangoes.  That was the medicine I needed, and I felt very clear afterwards, yet still somewhat troubled.  This morning I needed to run some errands in a very busy, mundane, commercial and rednecky area of the city.  I went first to a local farmer's market, which was decent, and bought a bunch of large fresh cantaloupes.  Then I went and got some speakers for the new "sound system" at the ashram aka speakers for the new ipod.  Already I have hundreds of hours of classes by Radhanath Swami and bhajans by the late Aindra Prabhu downloaded onto it.

As I go about my days in Louisville, I feel so incredibly sad for the suffering people of this city.  So many of them appear so bewildered; either with complete madness, aimlessly meandering in the hot sun, dirty and disheveled with no sense of hope or peace, or they seem completely absorbed in their personal sense gratification, eyes glazed over with a false sense of pleasure and security in their oversized cars and grossly overweight bodies.  What could I possibly do?  Only an extremely rare soul will even tolerate hearing about Krishna and about Bhakti, or so it seems.  And of the ones that listen, only a small fraction of those will take to devotional service.  But I must press on.  Krishna is helping me in every way possible.  He's given me all facility, all the tools I need, plenty of food, enough money, a car, and now he's so kind he's helping me set up a program at the local yoga studio, if all goes well.  But it is a long road.  I've been trying to remain very focused in my morning sadhana.  Lots of concentrated japa for long periods.
 I need to be more open, more willing to sacrifice, and more inviting.  But, it's been a trip just getting the center cleaned up and decent for visitors, and it's just now at that point.  Today I did a lot of yard work and got the bathroom clean, finally.  Tomorrow is looking to be a special day because I've invited the sangha over to the house for a sort of inauguration of the center, sure to be full of lots of kirtan, feasting, and Krishna katha (talks about Krishna).  Really looking forward to that.  So I'm going to be preparing for that all day tomorrow, even though I was hoping to selfishly have that day to myself.  And then, On Monday a group of traveling monks (brahmacaris) might be coming to stay the night, hopefully!    
More and more I'm just staying focused on Radhanath Swami.  With the new ipod, I have his classes playing for hours as I work, which is totally priceless for my Bhakti.  Today during his class he said something which elucidated so well on my personal pain over the condition of the suffering souls I mentioned: "The greatest poverty is to not see Him, to not feel Him, to not know Him and to not love Him.  And the only real wealth, the only real fortune in all of this creation is realization of Krishna, love for Krishna, experience of Krishna in our lives.  Everything that we are looking for in everything we are pursuing in life; the fulfillment of that desire can only be had in Krishna."  Radhanath Swami speaks to my heart more deeply than anyone else.

A calf gets the mercy

At this point I'm looking extremely forward to going to India.  I was thinking today, that perhaps I should spend some time in his ashram in Chowpatty.
The suffering of the people here breaks my heart, but Srila Prabhupada and Radhanath Swami hold the pieces together and give me the strength to carry on the work destined for me.  I have no other strength but them and my other spiritual guardians.  May they look over me and bless me with the spiritual strength to serve.

Using Pain As Fuel For Bhakti

Many people think that spiritual living means becoming happy and blissful through a connection with something higher than this material existence.  Bhakti is a bit different.  In Bhakti we do not strive to become happy and joyful.  What?  A Bhakti Yogi desires simply to be an instrument of service and devotion to God.  He or she does not attempt to avoid suffering and grasp at happiness, because they see that both conditions are simply mental states and perceptions of the flickering mind.  What one loves, another hates, and so on.  What one person takes pleasure in is for another person a nightmare.  So the Bhakti yogi is able to go beyond searching for happiness in this material world through realizing that actual happiness comes through a deep heart connection with God through a life of dedication and service.  How does that translate on a day-to-day level?  "yat karosi yad asnasi yaj judos dads yat yat tapasyasi kaunteya tat jurusva mad arpanam"  "O [Arjuna], all that you do, all that you eat, all that you offer and give away, as well as all austerities that you may perform, should be done as an offering unto Me"  BG 9:27.  Srila Prabhupada then says "Thus, it is the duty of everyone to mold his life in such a way that he will not forget Krishna in any circumstance."  Beautiful.  It is through sadhana and service that we build that rainbow bridge from our heart to the very heart of God.  For it to be Bhakti it must be done with love and devotion.  Simply performing austerities for their own sake or for any material cause, such as liberation from suffering, political maneuvering, or trying to obtain mystic powers, etc, is essentially futile.  But anything done for Krishna in love and devotion is permanent and for the welfare of everyone.

Today a person I was trying to hire for a small job showed up completely unprepared for the job and I turned him down.  He got angry and frustrated and left in a rush.  It was of course an uncomfortable situation.  That and some other stress were weighing on me earlier.  So what did I do?  Did I curse him and go for a cold beer or a joint?  Did I flip on the tv and zone out and say whatever?  No, I meditated on how this material world is essentially a place of suffering for everyone and rejoiced that Krishna had given me this opportunity to turn my own suffering into lamentation of my material bondage and separation from Krishna, and I took shelter of Radhanath Swami.  The Bhakti Yogi appreciates that suffering and pain can detach us from aspirations for trying to enjoy and exploit this world and hoping that the world and it's objects will bring happiness and contentment.
Some think this sounds pessimistic or negative, but actually it is the opposite.  The deep sense of happiness and peace that a Yogi feels cannot be compared to the little drops of flickering happiness we can extract from trying to enjoy our senses.  The highs of drugs are like firecrackers compared to the golden volcano of Chaitanya Mahaprabhu  overflowing us with divine eternal love of God.  If we can actually grasp that this world is simply a very pale reflection of the eternal realm of spiritual bliss, like a tree reflected on water, then we can start to aspire for yoga.  Every way we try to become happy materially leads eventually to more suffering.  Everything we become attached to in this world will be taken away.  It's that simple.  If we haven't seen it yet, we will eventually.  But what we can access and experience through yoga is a completely different experience of life, one of detachment, peace, and ever-increasing spiritual bliss....the catch though is that we don't strive to get to this state, it simply happens as a side-effect of our sincere dedication and practice.  The Yogi is not trying to be happy and sane, he just is through his life of spiritual wisdom and practice.  "He (the Bhakti Yogi) quickly becomes righteous and attains lasting peace." BG 9:31. This is Krishna's mercy on the sincere aspirant and not through our own strength and endeavor.  
BG 6:47: "And of all yogis, he who always abides in Me with great faith, worshiping Me in transcendental loving service, is most intimately united with Me in yoga and is the highest of all."  

                                        Jai, all glories to Srila Prabhupada.  Hari Haribol !!! 

The Great Banyan Tree

"The Supreme Personality of Godhead said: It is said that there is an imperishable banyan tree that has its roots upward and its branches down and whose leaves are the Vedic hymns. One who knows this tree is the knower of the Vedas."  BG 15:1

A Celeste Fig tree (a type of banyan!) I planted at the house over two years ago, flourishing.

The world we live in and experience is a reflection of the eternal and spiritual realm, like a reflection on water is simply a flickering dual image of the real object.  Our senses are reflections of Krishna's divine and Supreme senses.  My question is, if something is being utilized in Bhakti as devotional service, is it still a material object?  Is anything material if it all comes from Krishna?  Is this world all an illusion?  

Bhagavad Gita teaches us that the material world is illusion in that it is temporary.  Everything is constantly changing here, our bodies, the weather, our moods, even entire empires and civilizations change like the seasons.  Everything in this world turns to ashes and dust eventually.  However, the spark of life in all entities is imperishable energy and consciousness.  This process of Bhakti allows us to transcend the  four-fold prison of the body-mind-senses-false ego and become situated in bliss.  How?  Through loving service and spiritual practice.  Chanting and kirtan take us out of the material and into the spiritual.  The more we connect with that and open our heart, the more love flows and the more bliss we feel in that connection with our source, Krsna.  Bhakti is reciprocation; the ultimate, eternal reciprocation.  What type of reciprocation could ever possibly satisfy us more than connection with our original source, maintainer, and absolutely most dear friend.           

The service opportunity I have been desiring was made today.  I have an interview with a teacher at a very progressive yoga studio next week to talk about us doing kirtan programs!  I'm very happy about that.  That will be SO excellent.  

Jai Srila Prabhupada

I've decided also today to make Sundays a day of reflection and extra chanting, in Cherokee Park.  

A lot of old energy is moving out of the house and it's being filled with the Holy Names and sattvic arrangements.  

I've been really absorbing myself in Radhanath Swami lately.

His Holiness Radhanth Swami

This is a very excellent time in my life and I feel incredibly fortunate and blessed.  I want to do al I can to help bring this heart yoga to as many interested people as possible.

To me, Bhakti is like an endless ocean of divine nectar.

Krishna, how can I become closer to you?  What will it take for me to be attracted to Your Holy Names?  How can I have faith in something I can't see or touch?  Please enlighten us from within the heart, dear Krishna.

Krishna's breakfast!

Simply Bliss

"Our movement is for ananda, simply bliss, and the method of pushing this movement is chanting, dancing, feasting and philosophizing."  Srila Prabhupada 1969  Jai!
Today was a special day.  Actually everyday is a very, very special day.  It's a day in which we can either come closer to God or to become lost in the world.  It's a day where we can work on ourselves, weed out our negative tendencies, question our fears and attachments, and study the words of wise spiritual teachers.
It can either be a step forward or a few steps back.  It's all really an internal journey however.  We need to use everyday to cultivate our hearts as gardens of love and devotion to God and to weed out all the nasty stuff.
Krishna is in my heart and I never feel lonely or alone.

Planting fruit trees is such a wonderful and useful thing to do.

Major progress today on the project.  Got a fig tree planted next to the south side of the house, for warmth.  Beans and squash are coming up in the garden.  I also did some major cleaning as well as weeding and cleaning up trash around the yard.

I get SO much inspiration from my siksha (instructing) guru His Holiness Radhanath Swami.   I absolutely trust him with my life and soul.  His classes are so incredible and can be found here:




http://audio.iskcondesiretree.info/index.php?q=f&f=%2F02_-_ISKCON_Swamis%2FISKCON_Swamis_-_R_to_Y%2FHis_Holiness_Radhanath_Swami%2FLectures%2F01_-_Theme_wise

All wild flowers today, and very fragrant.  I love the tiny little white ones,
they are especially fragrant and grow on a nice wild vine.

 We found out a few days ago that my mother has cancer.  So I put her on a 100% raw vegan diet and she actually likes it.  She's also reading Radhanath Swami's autobiography, The Journey Home.  She also does service for Krishna and reads the Gita sometimes.  I'm also getting her acupuncture and reiki treatments.  Since my Dad passed away last year, I've become something of a guardian for her.    

The Divine Eternal Couple Radha-Krishna

When we dedicate every day to Krishna, then that day becomes perfect and happy.  I pray to dedicate every day to serving Krishna and the devotees.    Jai Srila Prabhupada.

We all want peace

Hare Krishna,
I have been thinking about that man I met yesterday.  He was expressing that he wishes he had peace.  He has the spiritual focus, he has the raw food super-diet, the healthy body, and he has the time.  But he lacks peace in his heart and mind.  He wishes for the "peace that passes understanding."  He extolled on his spiritual pursuits and said he had "read" on "all" the different religions, including Krishna Consciousness.  The catch though, is that Krishna can never be understood or experienced simply through books.  Krishna can't even be experienced through books and chanting and trying to practice Krishna Consciousness.  Krishna is experienced through service with devotees.  We must absolutely spend time with devotees and be doing service, while also doing our practices.  It's a science.  It cannot be understood by the mind only.  The intelligence only goes so far.  At some point we have to let go and just try it.  We can only understand Krishna through His devotees and no other way, ever.      

Ever-playful Radha Krishna

I simply listened to him and pondered the situation.  He was quite intelligent, nice and humanitarian, but it was easy for me to see his limitations that are holding him back from his spiritual ideals.  (I pray to see my own limitations and faults so easily).  I hope he finds that peace.  And I hope we do also.
I feel that spiritual peace very regularly through any service I dedicate to Krishna.  When I forget Krishna, then all hell starts to break loose.  I'm actually very fallen and weak but Krishna is causelessly merciful and patient with me.  If we can simply give Krishna a chance with us; just stop thinking we know this, we've seen that, and just allow Krishna to work on us.  We need humility.  Please Krishna help us to serve and be humble.  Jai Sri Krishna, Jai Mahaprabhu, Jai Srila Prabhupada.   Haribol.  

The beautiful morning sun illuminates the altar

Krishna's breakfast!  "A breakfast fit for God"

The new Fig tree for the orchards 

Intensity, conflict, new meetings, and healing

It's been an intense few days.  I ran into an old friend from my teen years the other day.  He is a few years younger and we were very close years ago, until he started to turn to heavy drugs and hanging with really negative, criminalistic people.  Hearing of his recent exploits and trouble from another friend was difficult and made me a bit weary.  He's really on the road to hell.  So when I ran into him I at least tried to engage him in some service, fed him food offered to Krishna (prasadam), and tried to help.  I could see and feel his troubled spirit and he's right now in jail for major theft.  So, I'm awakening to the fact that being here in the city is a whole new paradigm from what I got accustomed to; living in remote places with saintly people.  I can only pray for protection over the little domain I'm creating as a place of peace.  That and some other little conflicts occurred with other people in my life, so, there must be something happening in the stars.....
So today I decided I needed some space and time to reflect.  But first I went and bought a used electric lawnmower from someone I found online.  It was an older lady and we got to talking and she was interested in yoga and so I gave her a Back to Godhead magazine.  Then, I went to the healthfood store to get some things.  They had really nice little fig trees for sale so I bought one so Krishna could have figs.  While in the store I connected with an interesting man.  His name is Dan and he is riding his bicycle from California to New York on 100% raw vegan foods.  We hung out for a few hours.  He knew I was into Krishna by my tilak (I love people thinking of Krishna when they see how I am dressed or decorated!) So we hung out, went to the farmers market, philosophized for a while and ate some fruit and drank juice.  He was a spiritually conscious person, very much in sattva and raja guna, and a charitable person.  He's actually famous online as a raw food expert and healer.  So I took some interesting  and useful aspects of his mission into my being, specifically some healing modalities on releasing old pain and anarthas.  It was a sweet and intense interaction and after a couple of hours we hugged goodbye and I gave him a kirtan cd, some prasadam (raw of course!) and small book on Krishna.  I suggested he stop at the Columbus, OH temple on his way up to NYC, which is an awesome place. 
So after that I went to Cherokee Park, one of my favorite places on Earth.  It's a very large city park in the heart of the hippie/alternative/Yippie part of town.  The park is very spacious and aesthetic, with lots of diversity.  It was always my place of peace when I grew up in Louisville.  So I went there and wrote in my journal, watched the huge catfish and turtles swim in the creek, and chanted Hare Krishna on my beads for a few hours.  It was VERY refreshing and calming.  On the way home I stopped at a new yoga studio and inquired about doing programs there.  I got the card for the manager, who I will try to meet soon.  I then arrived back at the Sanctuary and put in some time cleaning.  I'll be so glad when it's all nice and pukka there.  It needs another 12-15 hours of strenuous cleaning work to get there.  So, it's been a day of healing and reflection.      

Chainsawing can be devotional service

Hare Krishna,

So, that wonderful rainstorm the other day took down a large limb off a tree in my mom's front yard.  So, I decided to take it down myself.  I borrowed a chainsaw from my elderly neighbors and got to it.  As I was sawing I was thinking about any nice uses of the wood for Krishna...legs for a table?  Maybe firewood for a snowy campfire kirtan party?  Sounds nice, right? 

My new-found ecstasy is decorating this little altar with flowers every morning.  I'm getting really into it.  I'm making progress on the house too.  The kitchen is almost finished and it's so nice to have a clean kitchen with all new suchi (never used for meat; clean) pots and pans for Krishna.  Jai.  It's also cooled down a bit, which is a relief.  I finished one garden bed last night and applied lots of compost and natural fertilizer, and today I'll start planting beans and squash and see what happens.  It's a bit late, but we'll see.  I'm planning on trying to have a gathering and housewarming here at the house in the next week or two and inviting some people over.  Wanna come over and chant and feast?

(Re)breaking ground

This morning I felt a strong urge to get going with the gardening (very late start!) So after chanting japa for about an hour I re-broke some ground for the garden bed.  I say re-broke because I gardened in this exact same spot over 12 years ago, and did for several years.  I even found an old buried zucchini plant tag.  I also layered some blackberry plants (easy propagation technique in the photo below).
My foray into the hatha yoga studio scene was extremely hot and a bit stressful today, but I found bliss in this service anyway.  It was mostly uneventful, only met two yoga teachers (who were nice and very southern), the rest of the centers were closed.  So I did what I could.  I also donated a Bhagavad Gita to the local library.  I also went shopping for Krishna and got some local organic peaches, a lot of other bhoga (food) and some gardening supplies, including seeds and organic mushroom compost. :)

It's been a bit of a challenging day but I am happy and feeling more centered now that I'm out of traffic and the blessed rainstorms are cooling everything off, whew!  Thank you rain (Indra).  So I carry on.

Progress

Hare Krishna,

Today was extremely hot.  I am making progress on the project, cleaning, cleaning, cleaning.  I made a little offering of garden flowers on the make-shift altar today and posted pictures.  Tomorrow I am going to go to the local yoga studios and ask the teachers about doing Bhakti programs at their studios.  I also starting writing letters to inmates interested in Krishna Consciousness, which is a pretty intense service.  Some of them are very nice and some sound quite unbalanced and troubled, which is to be expected.  I've been offering fresh blackberries from the garden here and plenty of flowers, all from the land, which is wonderful.  My dream is to create a sanctuary for loving devotion, peace, and spiritual advancement.  Hare Krishna.

Day One

Hare Krishna.  Blissful and tired....the first steps toward establishing a Sankirtan Bhakti Yoga center in Louisville were taken today-cleaning, and lots of it.  I started cleaning out the old family house which will serve as the center...it was a great day of menial service offered to Srila Prabhupada.  This project has been in my heart for a very long time but I was never surrendered to the idea of actually doing it...until the house suddenly became available and Krishna suddenly said "GO!!!!" So I am trying my best to offer this little project at the Lotus Feet of Srila Prabhupada and Sri Chaitanya Mahaprabhu.  May their mercy and power rain down on Louisville like a monsoon and deliver everyone with an ear to hear about God and spiritual life, and the glory and divine knowledge of Bhakti.      
Hare Krishna